for a while
it was just too terrible
to live inside the sharp edges
of my skin
so i went away-
for a while i was the swelling
in the gecko's neck-
for a while i was the blur
of hummingbird wings-
for a while i was waxy palm leaves
and ripe fruit-
for a while
i sunk into the sounds
that made no sense-
the singing and wailing and screaming-
the rooster call
and barking dogs
and the blare of radio distortion-
for a while i was anywhere but here.
then i slipped into the blackness
of my own heart
and found myself
a foreign country
speaking a strange tongue
gesturing wildly to make myself
understood.
i found myself searching for
a familiar road-
something not covered in
dust and suffering-
something soft and cool-
something beneath this fever dream-
something like your voice
speaking my name-
speaking words i can understand-
calling me home.
im speaking your name right now baby. counting down the days ...
ReplyDeleteawesome poem. love it.
Praying you find an equilibrium. Be well . . .
ReplyDeletethe lord is wrapping his arms around you momma!
ReplyDeletedave: i hear you. thank god i hear you.
ReplyDeletesarah: it's a hard place to be, but i'm still glad i'm here.
danny: yes. i know. thanks honey.
Your poet soul and its longings are precious. God speed to you, Terri.
ReplyDeleteno words. just {hug} and hold on tight.
ReplyDeletehow is it that i miss you so much when we've never even met?
cheryl: thank you for that. i need all the godspeed i can get.
ReplyDeletekirsten: yes, that's odd isn't it? i miss you too. thank for peeking in.