I've been thinking about the kind of person I'm becoming.
I want to be kind and gentle and forgiving. I want to be thoughtful. I want to live simply. I want to have integrity. I want to be available and open. I want to be wise. I want to care for my body and soul so that I am well. More than anything, I want to love freely.
And I want all of these things to come easily. But they don't.
It's occurred to me lately that I've been drifting in directions that I haven't chosen. Depression and anxiety and cynicism are easy for me. I don't have to work at all to find myself in dark places. I can blame this on hormones or my history or illness or any number of other things, but none of that really matters in the end.
I am becoming.
And that's a hopeful thing because it means I can become in another direction.
So I think I will.