Wednesday, September 29, 2010

becoming

I've been thinking about the kind of person I'm becoming.

I want to be kind and gentle and forgiving. I want to be thoughtful. I want to live simply. I want to have integrity. I want to be available and open. I want to be wise. I want to care for my body and soul so that I am well. More than anything, I want to love freely.

And I want all of these things to come easily. But they don't.

It's occurred to me lately that I've been drifting in directions that I haven't chosen. Depression and anxiety and cynicism are easy for me. I don't have to work at all to find myself in dark places. I can blame this on hormones or my history or illness or any number of other things, but none of that really matters in the end.

I am becoming.

Right now.

And that's a hopeful thing because it means I can become in another direction.

So I think I will.

12 comments:

  1. ooooh. i like this one momma.

    you are becoming in a different direction. and it is beautiful.

    i love you momma.

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  2. Amen to becoming. Bless you, Terri.

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  3. feeling lucky to be within earshot of your becoming even more beautiful than you already are.

    love you terri.

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  4. danny: you inspire me, honey. i wanna be just like you when i grow up. :)

    sarah: i think we're on similar paths, though our circumstances are very different. thanks for listening.

    di: i feel lucky that you're within earshot too, sister. love you a lot...

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  5. this is beautiful t. i love how you put it to words. your gift is amazing ...

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  6. dave: you're amazing. love you.

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  7. This made me smile.

    So many of the things you listed are exact descriptors that I have in mind for you already. (And because you shared some of your journey into simplicity with us earlier this year, I cannot hear the words "live simply" or "simplicity" without you coming to mind.)

    PS: I *really* like the quote about listening that is on your blog banner right now. If this were Facebook, I would "like" it multiple times: like, like, like! :)

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  8. thank you christianne. you make me smile all the time. and i think those descriptors sound a lot like you. :)

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  9. becoming is very becoming on you. i look forward to this journey g-friend...

    love you...

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  10. I think I am always wanting to be more... I wonder when I will get there..

    very frustrating..

    feeeel ya girl.

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  11. sy: i don't think any of us really "get there". but that's ok. at least we're pointed in a direction, and maybe that's what matters.

    welcome.

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