tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post8825855621225861711..comments2023-08-16T09:06:24.871-05:00Comments on listening out loud: Breaking Open: my scenic route to God~PART SEVENterrihttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comBlogger25125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-84917165781359829182008-01-16T10:46:00.000-06:002008-01-16T10:46:00.000-06:00Sorry I'm late for the party, but I brought snacks...Sorry I'm late for the party, but I brought snacks. :)<BR/><BR/>I still find it hard to believe that there are churches that do this sort of thing. It's hard for me to wrap my head around. It took a lot of courage to leave.<BR/><BR/>I'm so glad that you are able to look past all the hurt to glean some of the "loot" you were able to take from the experiences. That takes a lot of courage too.Tomhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04338367408403679236noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-34525981158089757072008-01-16T10:17:00.000-06:002008-01-16T10:17:00.000-06:00Umm . . . "blessings in disguise" seems to fit for...Umm . . . "blessings in disguise" seems to fit for me.<BR/>T. that absolutely was one of the hardest things I ever went through. I remember telling God that I didn't think I could leave on my own, that I would have to be sure it was the right thing to do, give me some kin of sign. Please. (like we ever get those kind of deals!)<BR/> That was on a sat. night. Didn't sleep a wink. Got kicked outdavehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06367346550402090368noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-12710067867014758322008-01-15T18:48:00.000-06:002008-01-15T18:48:00.000-06:00chloe: thanks for the kind words and for letting m...chloe: thanks for the kind words and for letting me know that i'm not the only one.<BR/><BR/>poet: i'm so glad to have you hear and i'm so jealous that you know what nate looks like. :) and messes are not always a bad thing. you've got to make a few of them if you are going to learn anything worthwhile. peace little sister.terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-34238486919120204452008-01-15T17:42:00.000-06:002008-01-15T17:42:00.000-06:00TerriJust wanted to drop by to say hello. I am at ...Terri<BR/>Just wanted to drop by to say hello. I am at Nate's house on his net. I touched base with Kirsten and Christianne yesterday and meant to send a hello to you, my fair Nathan was dragging me out the door to go somewhere. I have been reading some of your comments it is clear to me that you have a heart after God. Thanks for reading about my explosion, still I am wading through a mess, but Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-11194861664886011482008-01-15T15:58:00.000-06:002008-01-15T15:58:00.000-06:00I can imagine how hard it must have been for to pu...I can imagine how hard it must have been for to pull away from the church to follow your own truth. You are one brave woman. On a smaller scale, I’ve also experienced judgment (and on some level rejection) for walking my own path. I am loving your story. It’s rekindling surprising memories for me.Chloehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15042066987180810998noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-75002391852019551612008-01-14T21:51:00.000-06:002008-01-14T21:51:00.000-06:00sharp: buy the jeans. isn't it awful that churches...sharp: buy the jeans. isn't it awful that churches get so lost sometimes. it's almost as if there's human beings involved. :)<BR/><BR/>holly: thanks. let me know when you write that story.terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-44322900654817577242008-01-14T19:28:00.000-06:002008-01-14T19:28:00.000-06:00You ladies are too kind, but I do appreciate your ...You ladies are too kind, but I do appreciate your words. I could go on and on about my experience in the church (borderline cult?) I grew up in and perhaps one day I will write my own series about where I came from and where I've come to. It is amazing to look back and see how God has been at work in my life (in many lives) for so long a time. When I look back at where I once was, that is whenHollyMariehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12316447804006046943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-11538358031899426512008-01-14T16:52:00.000-06:002008-01-14T16:52:00.000-06:00I became a Christian at a charismatic church. Ther...I became a Christian at a charismatic church. There was no Holiness Code but there sure was a Holy Spirit Code. Our spirituality was measured by how many times we had miraculous healings (of your car, your cat, it didn't matter), spoke in tongues, were knocked on your back during a prayer service, or gave prophecies. I never demonstrated any of those things! All decision making in the church was Sharphttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14071323958316695539noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-24879284882317075172008-01-14T15:09:00.000-06:002008-01-14T15:09:00.000-06:00yeah, for sure. she's crazy talented!yeah, for sure. she's crazy talented!terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-17472215767015796322008-01-14T15:04:00.000-06:002008-01-14T15:04:00.000-06:00OH MY GOSH Holly! really talented! where to begin,...OH MY GOSH Holly! really talented! where to begin, your paintings, the adoption stories, the heart for africa pendant...I better go peek some more. Thanks for the tip off Terri. all mighty beautiful.dihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07711461934901423087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-61381210349287509782008-01-14T13:26:00.000-06:002008-01-14T13:26:00.000-06:00holly: wow, i was going to say i can't imagine any...holly: wow, i was going to say i can't imagine any church coming down on you for wanting to go to brazil, but i guess that's not true. i'm so glad that you were able to push through all that nonsense and that you found a voice here to articulate some of your experience. keep talking.<BR/><BR/>oh, and i peeked in on your art website and absolutely loved it. you're really talented!terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-56242289689838400002008-01-14T13:24:00.000-06:002008-01-14T13:24:00.000-06:00di: yeah, i kind of forgot about that sketch even ...di: yeah, i kind of forgot about that sketch even though it's hanging on my bulletin board. and thanks for greeing drea for me and for the rousing endorsement of my site. although i don't think it contains the answers to all of life's little mysteries, it is a nice place to hang out now and then.<BR/><BR/>drea: i don't know any of the details of your experience, but i'm glad if this was somehow terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-80923409496738057962008-01-14T07:21:00.000-06:002008-01-14T07:21:00.000-06:00Just found your blog and I have to say that it is ...Just found your blog and I have to say that it is truly amazing how many people share a similar story... mine is similar to yours as well; the whole church experience... the extreme guilt I felt after going to the MOVIE THEATER for the first time in my life at age 20, even though I KNEW it was not "wrong"... How pained I felt when I made the decision to serve in Brazil for 2 short months (unheardHollyMariehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/12316447804006046943noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-28092596537800193232008-01-14T01:17:00.000-06:002008-01-14T01:17:00.000-06:00just gotta say...nice work with the pictures and t...just gotta say...nice work with the pictures and the watermelon analogy, I had to read it twice but it makes sense in a really cool way. Thank you for opening up this part of you, it is amazing to be a part of your life.Heatherhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15369665147989730243noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-54222458591304997462008-01-14T00:53:00.000-06:002008-01-14T00:53:00.000-06:00HI DREA! any chance you remember those billboards ...HI DREA! any chance you remember those billboards that exclaimed I FOUND IT? please stick around ~ from one study in contradictions to another, you will find here what you are searching for with all of your heart.<BR/><BR/>Terri, this is so beautiful. How God turns everything around for good.<BR/><BR/>WE LOVE YOU LORD!dihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07711461934901423087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-34046163638593677032008-01-14T00:27:00.000-06:002008-01-14T00:27:00.000-06:00God means so much to me. This post is encouraging ...God means so much to me. This post is encouraging because I am currently going through my own struggle involving my relationship with God. I grew up an AME with close ties to a Baptist Church but as far as individual belief I was inspired by my family to figure out what I believed and stick with it. For that reason I rejected a lot of what I learned at church due to contradictions that they Dreahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15934730869479377875noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-64131268509252648372008-01-13T23:51:00.000-06:002008-01-13T23:51:00.000-06:00"God has pitched his tent in a Camp called crisis"..."God has pitched his tent in a Camp called crisis" reminds me of that sketch of yours.dihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07711461934901423087noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-79671215942402836862008-01-13T23:32:00.000-06:002008-01-13T23:32:00.000-06:00eclexia: i won't lie to you, there were times that...eclexia: i won't lie to you, there were times that i was so bitter and so full of hate and fear that i felt lost in it. but enough time has passed to give me the advantage of perspective and i never feel that way anymore. anger and grief? sometimes, but even those emotions are not very prominent. i'm glad you're celebrating God's faithfulness: that's really what all of this means to me now.<BR/><terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-88339150197350707142008-01-13T21:42:00.000-06:002008-01-13T21:42:00.000-06:00Terri,Most of the truly dramatic changes I’ve obse...Terri,<BR/><BR/>Most of the truly dramatic changes I’ve observed in the lives of others and myself have come through a definitive crisis experience(s). It’s as if God has pitched His tent in a camp called Crisis and waits for us to show up so we can hear Him clearly and so that He can minister to us. Keep writing; I’ll keep reading and learning.Nathanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15036312314488843312noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-71800789204573833262008-01-13T20:54:00.000-06:002008-01-13T20:54:00.000-06:00Thanks so much for telling your story in this way....Thanks so much for telling your story in this way. <BR/><BR/>You are so right about the obstacles. There are enough paradoxes and mysteries in choosing God and his ways; we certainly don't need to add our own. <BR/><BR/>One thing that strikes me as beautiful in your story is how the grief over what shouldn't have been the way it was is pure. Meaning, it is grief and sometimes anger. But not eclexiahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/14267603726576576420noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-75213827314661831092008-01-13T20:06:00.000-06:002008-01-13T20:06:00.000-06:00Kirsten: I went back and read your post that you m...Kirsten: I went back and read your post that you mentioned. You must have written that right before I started peeking in. Funny how we're telling each other's story, isn't it? You sound very different today, but there's no illusion that the same confusion and sorrow won't be rolling around again sometime. Maybe just less resistance and a tiny bit more trust. It's so much easier to see the terrihttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08284855262535595879noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-52895390280910965782008-01-13T19:34:00.000-06:002008-01-13T19:34:00.000-06:00I, too, was really moved by this post. All the ima...I, too, was really moved by this post. All the imagery of the watermelon being split wide open and causing you a migraine was really vivid. <BR/><BR/>I find myself at a loss for words today. So much going on inside that I can't focus well. So for now, I will say that I love you, love your heart, and am blessed even more closely into God's heart through your story. <BR/><BR/>I just happened to christiannehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06278757714101308785noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-60398279205325685852008-01-13T19:14:00.000-06:002008-01-13T19:14:00.000-06:00"I split in half like a big ripe watermelon droppe..."I split in half like a big ripe watermelon dropped on the sidewalk and there was a part of me that asked the questions with her. Wet black seeds of doubt spread out all over the place."<BR/><BR/>Beautiful T..beautiful! <BR/><BR/>I will wait patiently for the day you write about mango's...CARPET!MKhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16888780317824744979noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-66671880541029526222008-01-13T17:19:00.000-06:002008-01-13T17:19:00.000-06:00What a story. It takes courage and a sense of bei...What a story. <BR/>It takes courage and a sense of being held in a greater love and home to take those fragile steps towards walking a different way, walking the way our hearts tell us we need to go, even when this means it leads us away from those we once believed to be the answer. <BR/>God is far more complicated than we allow god to be. Both light and dark, polarity always present, and goodbellahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/04165771647378109845noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3242695618504337982.post-14583691256863951982008-01-13T16:40:00.000-06:002008-01-13T16:40:00.000-06:00Oh, Terri!! You are writing here in a voice that ...Oh, Terri!! You are writing here in a voice that could almost be my own. Minus the husband and babies, minus the holiness rules ... it all sounds so achingly familiar. I can think of few things that could send a Christian into a tailspin more than being disowned by a church she has called home for many years.<BR/><BR/>The way you spoke of God being full of seeming opposites ... HOLD THE PHONE!kirstenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09789771023962578029noreply@blogger.com